Early Life Crisis

I had this idea to start a blog a few days ago and I had absolutely no idea what it should be about, what to call it, or what sort of topics I would ever write about. But then it hit me, it didn’t matter what kinds of things it was as long it was of interest to me, after all this is my blog right? It’s only as hard as you make it, and todayI’m blogging about nothing per say just things that have been on my mind for some time now. I’m calling it an early life crisis, basically it’s being young and being stressed out about not having under control let alone knowing what is even going on. It’s no fun, its kind of sucks actually because you know you have time to get things together but you feel like you’re too old not to know where you’re going in life, or at least that’s how I feel. I been in school what seems like forever and it seems like I’m nowhere near close to having a degree, I’m a single mother to a 1 year boy that’s about as smart as a 4 year old, and I lost my job two months ago and I have been able to find anything since. I’m not a factory kind of person, I mean its good money but they barley have time to do anything other than eat and sleep. With my never ending quest for my degree and my son that’s not going to happen! In the mean time while all of that is happening there is the constant urge to still be young and go out and have fun. Being social is a job in itself, or maybe I’m just really bad with people, who knows. Maybe I’m the type of person that doesn’t really care for going out but likes to do things for time to time. I know that I don’t care for the club or concerts because I hate crowded places, so you won’t see me in the club every weekend trying to get in free before 11.  But then there’s dating, and that…..that is just difficult. I mean there’s a  lot to it you have to find someone, find common interest, get to know them, spend time together and then even then sometimes it works out and sometimes it does. In my case it doesn’t and that’s not okay because what’s the point of spending all that time together just for it not to work out??? Sure it’s a “learning experience” and I get that but at the same time it’s like that time I could have put towards other things or trying to get things in a  better place for myself and give myself some much needed mommy time. Why can’t there just be a way to know if that person is worth my time or not maybe sometime app to search up their name and come across the results in the palm of my hand. It’ll go something like “yeah girl, he’s a keeper” or “run far far away girl he’s no good”. So simple and so easy and no time wasted! Sadly that is not how it works, you just have to go out on the limp and hope for the best.

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